New Year, New… You? Why?
Every year, we are inundated with the same message: 'New Year, New You.'
The idea that we should look at who we were last year, find what’s lacking, and become someone else this year. Change something. Fix something. Be something new.
And every January, the same thing happens. Gyms overflow, people buy 10 new books with the intention of reading all ten by February (only to read only two by September… it's me:/), boutique studios book out, and people rush in hoping that this time will be different. I saw it clearly when I taught at a boutique barre studio — my classes would be about 30% regular clients and 70% people trying something new, searching for their “new” selves.
I don’t think reflection is a bad thing. Looking back, reassessing, and setting intentions can be powerful. But at some point, I had a realization that changed everything for me:
I don’t want a new me. I want a more defined me.
A more defined me meant getting honest about what actually worked last year, what drained me, what supported me, and what didn’t. It meant asking where I was going - and whether that direction still felt right. It wasn’t about erasing who I was; it was about refining her.
After a few years of chasing the “new year, new me” energy, I changed the narrative. I started thinking in terms of same me, but better.
Not better in a hustle, punish-yourself way - but better in a progressive, intentional way. Pushing in certain areas, maintaining in others. Keeping what works. Tweaking what doesn’t. Letting growth be layered, not forced.
When I stopped trying to “fix” myself into someone new, the pressure lifted. Missing a goal didn’t mean I failed - it meant I needed to pause, reassess, and adjust. And that didn’t have to happen neatly on January 1st. Sometimes it happens in April. Or August. Or on a random Tuesday when you finally come up for air.
Because real life doesn’t move in straight lines.
Kids get sick. You get sick. You travel. You get tired. Motivation dips. Hormones shift. Sometimes you’re just not into it for a while - and that doesn’t mean you’ve lost everything. It means you’re human. But society tells us we should never slow down, never lose focus, never get distracted. That’s not just unrealistic - it’s harmful.
Consistency isn’t about never falling off. It’s about knowing how to get back on without shame.
When life knocks us out of rhythm, we don’t need to scrap the whole plan and declare ourselves broken. We need to re-evaluate, re-calibrate, and start again — gently, honestly, intentionally. That’s how real progress is built.
We are imperfect by design. We are meant to try, to miss, to learn, and to grow. And growth doesn’t come from becoming someone else - it comes from becoming more of who we already are.
So no, I’m not doing “new year, new you.”
I’m doing a new year with progressive goals, honest self-reflection, flexibility for real life, and intention behind every step.
Same me.
Just more defined.
